EP028: Ann's Story of Transformation

Jessica: Hi, friends! I'm here today with Ann and she's a part of our Avanti community and I'm so excited just to hear what you have to say about personal transformation. But before we go anywhere, why don't we start by hearing a little bit about you?

Photo by Ann Walton

Jessica: Wow!

Ann: So it's nice to get to know more people and be able to help them.

Jessica: Yeah, that's super cool! What were you doing before?

Ann: So same company, but it's a health insurance company so I was in their membership accounting department, which is basically I was in there on the individual side, so I helped members apply for health insurance, and I handled their enrollments, their eligibility and their billing along with customer service and sales.

Jessica: Oh, fun!

Ann: Yeah, it's nothing too exciting. HR is a little bit more fun.

Jessica: Yeah. Oh, that's super cool! What is one misconception because there's so much that people hear about HR. So what was like one misconception before you join the HR team versus, you're like, Oh, this is what it is?

Ann: Right? We really do try to help the employee. A lot of people think that HR care is more on the business side versus more on the employee side but what I really like about our HR team, and especially my bosses is that they really do care for the employee and they really do try to do whatever they can to help the employee out. If there's an issue and I'm just really happy that we are able to take the time to listen to their issues, figure out something to help them out and not just be like, well, oh, well, but it is what it is. So I actually do appreciate that. We do care.

Jessica: Yeah, that's really cool! And it's probably a lot of people's skill requirement to be able to help interpersonally.

Ann: So you really have to be able to listen and kind of empathize or sympathize with the employee and I'm glad that and we also try to do trainings on how to better talk to our employees so we don't accidentally make them feel worse and just make them know that we're listening and that we're on their side.

Jessica: Yeah, that's really cool. I think that's the key to a good company is having a really strong HR department. It kind of works that way.

Ann: Exactly!

Jessica: Because otherwise you just have a bunch of frustrated people who don't know how to communicate.

Ann: Exactly! We would just get yelled at all day so-

Jessica: Not a fun time for anybody!

Ann: I did the whole call center thing, it ooh!

Jessica: No, I'm like a [inaudible 5:17] fire so like if someone yells at me or cries. I'm also going to cry. Like no! no! We're both crying!

Ann: And now, we're both crying!

Jessica: This isn't helpful. So if I remember correctly, you have quite a few piercings.

Ann talks about her piercings

Ann: I have. I don't know if you can see, I have my double nostrils like you and then my septum and then various. I don't know if you could see that...various ear piercings.

Jessica: Yeah.

Ann: Probably gonna add more to the collection once this is all over so I'll probably be seeing you when it's all done.

Jessica: Did you start on your ears or your face first? Your ears, right?

Ann: I started on my ears first, just because that's all that I thought that I could get away with because, with most companies with their piercing policies, they really only talk about the face so I was like, well, they really don't say anything about ears. Just as soon as I turned 18, I kind of just went at it with my ears and then I started to kind of think about facial piercings because I've always wanted them but like I said, I never thought that I could get away with them because I was like, Oh, I'm gonna get turned down for jobs. How am I going to make money?

Ann: Exactly!

Jessica: It's like, oh, I have a business, I'll just hide it or I'm about to see grandma so I've got to hide it and then, you can go home and you could just be yourself.

Ann: Exactly! So that's I was really happy about it, and at first, it was kind of like, I mean, this might sound silly, but it was kind of like ohh it was my little secret.

Jessica: No, it's true! Yeah. I totally get that.

Ann: So yeah, I was really glad that I talked to more people who were kind of in that piercing scene and we're able to give me tips. Actually, you were there when I got my double nostrils because I went in with my roommates to look at jewelry and then I saw you with your double nostrils and then your septum. I was like I've seen that before. I think it's so cute but I wasn't sure if my work would let me do that because really the only facial piercing that they allow is a stud on the nose so you can have a nostril but no ring. It has to be a stud but I was like, and obviously they said no septums I tried to get away with it but I got busted. So not busted. I was like well, the handbook says a stud on the nostril, it didn't say only one so I decided to do my double nostrils which was kind of like a spur of the moment thing. I actually wasn't planning on getting in on anything pierced but I kind of have this shiny ball syndrome where I see jewelry and then I want it

Jessica: I do, too!

Ann: Yeah! I got the doubles done and then I just really liked it and knowing that works at anything except compliments so-

Jessica: Nice!

Ann: Yeah!

Jessica: Got away with it. Score! I mean it looks really lovely on you.

Ann: Thank you!

Jessica: Yeah! That's so cool. What was your first piercing then, your first ever piercing?

Ann narrates how she got her first piercing

Ann: My first ever piercing was like most people, my first lobes. I got those done when I was in fifth grade and I remember always being so jealous about because all my friends had their ears pierced as babies and I was so jealous like all throughout grade school like I want my ears pierced, I want my ears pierced! And my mom's like no, because you got to take care of them and because you're too young. You gotta take care of them so they don't get infected but I'm actually kind of glad that my mom had me wait because I was talking to another piercer about this too saying that one of his favorite piercings to do or ear piercings on kids who are 6 or 7 because it's one of the very first things that they get to decide for themselves.

Photo by Ann Walton

Jessica: Yeah.

Ann: With parental consent, of course, and that actually kind of took me back I'm like, oh, then I'm kind of glad that my mom had me wait because I remember getting them done. I remember the kind of the build-up, the anticipation, the anxiety, and then feeling so proud of myself after I got them done like, I got to pick out the jewelry myself and I just remember being so proud of myself. I was like, Oh my gosh, I'm so brave. I got stabbed. I didn't cry.

Jessica: That was awesome!

Ann: So unfortunately, since piercings were pretty new to me back then. We, unfortunately, went to Claire's because we didn't know better but going forward if I ever have kids and they're old enough to express to me that they want their ears pierced, I will definitely take them to a place like Avanti. No piercing guns!

Jessica: Yeah, The piercing guns-they're so popular but they really can do more harm than good just with blunt force trauma and that's where we see a lot of ears growing on the earrings situations.

Ann: Yeah, I've heard horror stories. I had a friend who went into her double lobe. She just went to a place like Claire's. Sorry, not to bash on Claire's but-

Jessica: Yeah!

Ann: No piercing guns. She went to get her double lobes and as soon...I know they call it piercing guns but they look like staplers to me.

Jessica: Yeah, I called them [inaudible 13:02] and then I'm like, Oh, I mean piercing gun.

Ann: I know, right? And it got stuck as soon as she like "It got stuck!"

Jessica: Ohh!

Ann: And the poor girl who was doing the piercing, I think she might have been new and oh, I feel so bad for her because obviously she didn't mean for any of this to happen. She was like, Oh my gosh, hold this and my friend is holding the piercing gun up to her ear. It's bleeding and the poor girl is trying to find her manager and she said it was horrible. It was so painful blood ever. Kids who were like my age when I first got there six, seven or eight, they're in there and they see what's happening to my poor friend. And then they're just like, I don't want---I'm not getting my ears pierced.

Jessica: Oh dear! Oh my gosh!

Ann: Yeah, and I remember changing out my earrings for the first time. I don't know if you've experienced this with people who have come to with problems, but I remember when I was changing out my earrings for the first time, I couldn't get the post out. It was stuck in there.

Jessica: Yeah.

Ann: And I was like, Oh my gosh, it's like my ear infused with the jewelry and I was pulling my ear. I am like I can't get it out!

Jessica: Well, the myth that you're supposed to twist your jewelry while it's in your ear, it comes from piercing guns because, with the blunt force trauma, your ear does kind of form a special punk with the jewelry that you have to twist. Whereas with a needle, that bond doesn't happen.

Ann: Because it's a lot cleaner, right?

Jessica: Yeah!

Ann: Sharp clean.

Jessica: It makes a space for the jewelry where with the piercing gun, it's forcing the jewelry, whether it's no space.

Ann: Oh, that makes sense!

Jessica: Yeah. And so that's why when you get pierced with a gun, make sure you twist it, is because otherwise, it will actually form a special bond with that jewelry.

Ann: Interesting!

Jessica: Not cool and gross at the same time.

Ann: It is, yeah. It's fascinating, but that makes a whole lot more sense now because I definitely twist it. I pry it, have clean hands, and all the care but. But now, it's definitely, it's more cut and dry. Do your aftercare. Don't touch it.

Jessica: Yeah.

Ann: It's so easy just don't touch them.

Jessica: Just spray and leave it alone.

Ann: Leave it alone and then you're good.

Jessica: Oh, what was your next piercing then after that?

Ann: So after that, it was my double lobes. Do you do kind of want me to go through kind of the whole timeline?

Jessica: Yeah, tell me everything we want to hear.

Ann’s whole timeline of getting her piercings

Ann: So yeah. First, my first lobes in fifth grade and then we moved on to my double lobes probably sometime when I was in middle school. Unfortunately, I went back to a place that year that used the piercing gun---oops but I wised up after that. I think after that when I was 19, something just kind of clicked in me and I just went to a place and got a helix, I guess.

Jessica: Oh! Very cool.

Ann: This is my first non-lobe, non-traditional, whatever, I don't know. Traditional is different for everyone so that was my first cartilage. I was super happy with it and then the next year, I went and got a tragus on my left and then triple lobes soon after that and then I waited a couple of years then I got my daith piercing because I saw the moon jewelry and I fell in love, I went in for it. I was going to go in for a conch or something but then I saw the moon jewelry that I saw at Avanti. I'm just like just kidding.

Jessica: It's so pretty.

Threadless 14k Gold Constellation Climber Tops

Jessica: Yes!

Ann: And then I came back and then I got my conch on my left ear.

Jessica: Yeah, I think that's right. I was looking back through your order history and that's yeah, that's what I saw.

Ann: Somewhere in between that, I got my---so this is my last piercing and then somewhere in between that, I got my septum which probably is my favorite just because it's a piercing that I've always wanted and I never thought I could have it so I'm super happy that I was able to figure something out and then it kind of inspired me to get more so then I got my double nostrils and yeah, I'm super excited and again once the closing is lifted, I would love to go back and get more, support Avanti.

Jessica: Thank you!

Ann: Because I would love to see you guys around for a lot longer.

Jessica: Yes, I will and I've been telling our customers, I've missed you guys! The best part of my day was when the customers would come in, and I'd get to hear your story, and I'd get to see what you're liking and all of like how your piercings are healing, and it's so sad that that's not happening right now.

Ann: Yeah! So hopefully, once this is all under control and I hope that you and the rest of the Avanti family are well and safe.

Jessica: Yeah, that'd be awesome. What are you hoping to get pierced next?

Ann shares what piercing she is looking forward to have

Ann: Probably, either a rook or probably just some more helix probably, I don't know like two right here something or -

Jessica: Cute.

Ann: Yeah, and actually--- I'm sorry?

Jessica: You have a perfect little frame right here for a flat too.

Ann: [inaudible 19:56] too.

Jessica: Yeah, that would be cute.

Ann: Yeah, and part of what I like is kind of seeing is coming into the shop and hearing what you guys have to say because you've been doing this for a while and it's nice to kind of hear what an expert will say like, Oh, you know, for your anatomy, this will probably be more flattering, and it's nice to have someone kind of help you along the way.

Jessica: Oh, well, I'm glad that's helpful! It's always fun. I see it as a collaborative art project. It's like, Oh, I like this sparkly thing, but I don't know where to put it in like, you should put it here and I know with myself, there's parts of my ear or my face that I see differently than how other people see it. So when they see it in a positive light, I'm always like, Oh, well, thank you!

Ann: Exactly! It's finding the beauty in everything.

Jessica: Yeah!

Ann: And it's just, you know, you pretty much just decorating yourself with pretty jewelry so-

Jessica: It's so true! Have you felt the piercings and the modifications make you feel more you or have you felt you were always yourself and this is just a way that you're showing it?

Ann shares how she feels with her piercings and body modifications

Ann: I feel like they have kind of made me more of myself because especially as I was younger, I was very afraid to express myself just because I was worried about what others would think and worried that like, oh, if I can't pull it off because I've kind of liked the more slightly alternative look but I just thought that oh, I can never pull that off. It's not me because I thought that people saw me one way or just always see me that way. I am like ohh shy little church mouse and I don't go to church but yeah, I think it's kind of---so once I kind of had that freedom, and I learned that I could get some more non-traditional piercings and get away with it, I think I've been very happy about expressing myself more and now that I'm older, I don't really care what people say as much anymore. I get the Oh, you look like a bowl with that nose ring or --- but it's whatever. I don't care anymore because, at the end of the day, your piercing should be for yourself and not for anyone else so-

Jessica: Yeah!

Ann: So that part of me has always been there. I just thought to as kind of a late bloomer, that's better late than never.

Jessica: I mean, I was too. I didn't really start getting modifications or anything like serious modifications I think until probably the last four years.

Ann: Oh wow! So what was your first?

Jessica: My first serious modification is my septum as well.

Ann: Nice!

Jessica: I actually just had my lobes pierced.

Ann: But they're already stretched pretty well.

Jessica: Yeah! I've been stretching them for three years now so I'm at 11/16" or something which is a little bit bigger than a 5/8".

Ann: Okay!

Jessica: I'm going towards an inches, it's a slow process. I am similar to you. I actually grew up super conservative, I'm a pastor's daughter and so I would always got that Oh, sweet Jessica.

Ann: Same!

Jessica and Ann talks about how piercings transformed them as a person

Jessica: Right? And I was like, okay, but I'm a person and I really like sparkly things and I love tattoos and I think art is beautiful and I want my hair to be hot pink and all that stuff and once you make one little change for yourself where you're like this is my body, this is my choice and it's that very like I'm brave and I did this and I am me now and you do care less about what people have to say because that joy of being you feel so much more than any negative. It goes over any negative comment you could get.

Ann: Exactly and that's what I learned too because I just remember getting my piercings done and just looking in the mirror constantly just being so giddy and overjoyed like wanting to take pictures, wanting to show them off and yeah, now surprisingly, I don't get a lot of negative comments usually from older folk about---or I just get kind of just weird like well, you have a lot of holes. I'm like, Okay.

Jessica: Yeah, okay.

Ann: Everyone say that, but usually, from people more of my age, I get a lot more accepting, compliments and so it is nice to hear those of course and then talk with people about what they plan on doing and what they like but again, back to what I said. At the end of the day, it's what you feel, it's what you think and if it makes you happy and more like yourself then that kind of what you said it--- it just goes over all the negative and because again, it's not for them so-

Jessica: Yeah!

Ann: Nothing to do with them.

Jessica: Exactly! Which is funny because I think that's the connotation that a lot of people think is that you get tattoos so that people look at you and think you're unique, but you're just tattooed like everyone else. That's a common I've heard before and I'm like, I don't care about anyone else. I didn't get it to be unique, I got it to be me. I happen to be a unique person.

Ann: Exactly!

Jessica: Yeah, I love what you said that whether it's good or bad in someone's eyes, it's for you at the end of the day, it doesn't really matter what anyone else thinks. Yeah, it's a really powerful truth to be able to own.

Ann: Exactly and I think that with stuff like this with body modification, there's still a little stigma attached to it. Thankfully, not as much but maybe I can't say as much because I'm not heavily modified and I haven't been in this scene for a very long time so obviously, people with a lot more piercings and tattoos and are have been around for a lot longer then and probably face more but kind of what I'm just tired of hearing just from my own experience, especially with my nose piercings is, oh, well, guys won't find that attractive. I'm like, Oh [inaudible 27:05-27:10]

Jessica: Yes. I also heard that before. I am like, Okay.

Ann: Guys won't find that attractive or Oh, you won't get a guy from that or if you start seeing a guy, he won't like them I am like okay, but what makes you think that I like him back?

Jessica: Exactly! Such a good question like okay, but then also I'm like, oh no does my husband know that he's not supposed to like me?

Ann: Okay so someone told me not told them like-

Jessica: Don't tell him like-

Ann: Keep it a secret!

Jessica: Keep it a secret like what---Oh yeah, people just say I am like, Okay,

Ann: If anything is going to attract the people that I do want to be around because they're going to be like hey stick piercing, look at mine like, you know?

Jessica: Right? They're gonna like you for you, not [inaudible 28:08] of you.

Ann: Well yeah! When you meet someone else with piercings, you already know a little about them so then people are more willing to talk to you and be like, Oh hey, I like this or Hey, I've been thinking about getting this like what's your experience or what do you think? It is nice because the people kind of feel comfortable with you-

Jessica: Yeah.

Ann: Like asking questions and so honestly, I've actually had some pretty good experiences, talking and meeting with new people who are curious, so-

Jessica: Yeah.

Ann: Anything. I'm meeting more people,

Jessica: Yeah, I know. It's very true. Having a lot of visible tattoos, I have a full sleeve and stuff. What I found is interesting as before that, I was more reserved but now that I literally wear my heart on my sleeve. It's a personal tattoo to me and it's like wearing your secret's out for the open. It's in turn, made me more open as well, which I've seen a lot in the modified world is people-you do-you wear your hearts on your sleeves, on your ears. It's their sparkly battle scars essentially and it does lead to, for the most part, a more caring and nurturing environment, which is the polar opposite of what you would think.

Ann: Exactly! And I always hear people saying at first, I was always afraid to go into a proper piercing or tattoo studio because I was afraid that Oh, I don't fit the look. I have blonde hair. I'm not tattoed, I'm not pierced, I'm not wearing punk rock clothes. I'm like, they're just gonna laugh at me and tell me to go to Hollister-that and so and I thought very, very wrong and so that was my bad. Because at first, I was just like, ooh, I think that style is really cool but what if I'm not really accepted but every shop I've been into has been really accepting. I've heard this from other people will say that some of the nicest people that they've met have been tattooed out and pierced and it because it's such kind of a welcoming and it's very welcoming and people feel safe and like that they have friends so thankfully, I was very very wrong and I felt really bad. I'm just like, Oh my gosh, they're all so nice here, they don't care that I don't look like them and they're so willing to help and they're so nice. If anyone is afraid to get their first piercing at a proper studio, don't be afraid, because a good and reputable shop will be very welcoming and very accommodating so-

Jessica: Yeah, I agree! I felt the same way even before I started working at one, as I started getting a little bit more pierced, I was always like, Oh, I don't belong here. I couldn't even go in Zumiez, I felt it was too hardcore for me. I go in, I wouldn't make eye contact with the jewelry cases.

Ann: I'm not worthy.

Jessica: I'm not worthy of this deal, jewelry.

Ann: No, I've been there. I'm just like, oh god, they're gonna know, I'm not one of them.

Jessica: I know but no one cares.

Ann: No one cares.

Jessica: And it's funny because then, on the other side of the counter, I felt the same way, which is funny, and I hope for anyone listening who's afraid to go to a tattoo shop, but get some hope knowing that maybe the person on the counter also felt once that they couldn't go into the store.

Ann: Yeah, don't be afraid. A good shop will not care what you look like, they will help you and don't be afraid.

Jessica: Don't be afraid. Before I let you enjoy the rest of this cloudy Oregon day. Is there any advice you have for any of our listeners?

Ann ends the conversation with an advice

Ann: My advice would be is definitely do your research. If you want to get pierced definitely look up some reputable shops in your area - Avanti is one of them.

Jessica: Thank you!

Ann: And go in and just remember that whatever you decide to get done, the only opinion that should matter is yours. Don't get anything to try to please others, get it for yourself, and that way, you will like it a lot more and if you get any negative comments, you'll be able to kind of brush them off more because piercings can be addicting, they are exciting. I kind of see it as decorating yourself. So, again, really do what you want, you will like it a lot more. The negative comments won't mean as much because you'll just be too overjoyed and happy and again, I can't stress this enough, do it for you, and only you and they'll be a lot more special, and you'll feel like yourself, and it's exciting and you'll never stop looking in a mirror.

Jessica: That's awesome advice! Thank you so much for your time for sharing your heart. It was great to see you again.

Ann: It was great to see you there. I was hoping that it would be you as like, Oh, I've seen you there a couple times. I'm like, Hi, it's me again.

Jessica: I don't like Oh, hello. What are you doing today? Well, I'm excited to see you in person when this is all over.

Ann: Oh you will see me when this is all over. I'll be first in line!

Jessica: Yes! Well, I hope you have a great rest of your day.

Ann: Thank you and you too. Take care!

Jessica: You too!

Ann: Bye!